None the less, it was amazing. I got to know myself a lot more over the last few months. Some of it wasn't too pretty. But that's ok, it's not supposed to be. Some of it was great. Much of what I learned was through the knowledge gained of my family, our stories, my heritage. I almost couldn't hear enough. Each story was like a missing piece in my own personal puzzle. I don't say that to be dramatic...I mean it. And I feel a bit more complete.
I guess at some point we decided to allow ourselves to be stretched beyond what we thought we could handle. I'm so glad we did (today at least. check back tomorrow I may say different). And in the past few months I realized something...we're ok. In other words when I look back and pick any story of our young family's history, the outcomes don't matter anymore. They just are what they are and we're ok.
Endings that seemed to be failures, moves that seemed to be wrong, results that seemed to be to good to be true, celebrations, defeats...they just are. And they're ours. And without them, we're nothing. We exist because we have a story!
We're settling in now. Unpacking boxes and setting up a two bedroom apartment which will be the backdrop for this chapter in our lives. It's fun, exhausting, difficult, and wild. Sometimes we want to pull our hair out, but most of the time we're too tired to try even that. None the less, we're thankful. Kelly's excited to get going on her masters and I'm thankful for an opportunity to volunteer with Habitat for Humanity. I'm still waiting for a shop so I can get set up and start making furniture again. But it's all happening right at the right speed. I'd like for some things to hurry along sometimes...but only when I lose sight of what's important.
Recaps are difficult. I'm not even sure why I'm attempting to wrap the last few months into one blog post. But oh well, it's a start. Just have to get back in the box and start swinging again. Here's to tomorrow. Here's to not knowing what it holds. Here's to walking around with a blindfold on and smiling at the same time. Here's to b&w photography and it's ability to leave us room to imagine the rest. Here's to a new year. Here's to being all over the place and yet knowing in the end...it's all ok.
Truth: I cried a bit when I read this. It all feels very familiar to me, and from that place I find myself excited to watch the Harp family journey unfold.
ReplyDeletegrace and peace to you and yours, Clint!
-Courtney
You are too wonderful Courtney! Thanks for the love...it really means alot to me.
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